New Dog? Like Buying a House.

It has been over three months since I lost my little Nikki, whom I called "Poopoo."  I know, silly, huh? I found out other owners do the same, call their dog some affectionate term instead of their given name. The dog doesn't care, believe me.

I have been enjoying sleeping in, not having to go out for the dog, not having to take her on a walk. But I have missed not getting up earlier, not having a dog to take outside and not having someone to take walking with me.  So I think I am ready for new baby to love.

I have filled out applications at some dog adoption website, mostly Petfinders.com and have some dogs I want, like this little honey who is called Ellie Mae. She is a Malti-poo. Maltese and Poodle mix, about 8 lbs, which is the size I want. It seems every breed is mixed with Poodles because they are smart and as non allergenic as you can get.  

Ellie Mae

Then there is Candy, a chi-pom. Yes, Chihuahua and Pomeranian mix, about 8 lbs. She is young, only about a year, has already had a litter of pups and runs around some trailer park. She really needs someone to care for her. She may not be ready for apartment and leash life, however. Here is Candy.

Candy

The most important is that the dog I get will have to like other dogs and people and especially kids. They have to be Lucy and Max approved. Nikki bit Joe when he was little so we can't have that happening. Dogs are also supposed to help you socialize with other dog owners. But Nikki did not like other dogs so she pretty much isolated me from other dog owners.  

I am waiting to hear back about these dogs or maybe others I have applied for. Two are already adopted that I was looking at earlier. So these two are still in the running. 

Who knew adopting a dog was like buying a house and getting a credit check? I guess they want to be sure you will be committed to the dog. I had Nikki for 14 years and 8 months so I guess I was pretty committed to a dog who bit my grandson and isolated me from other dog owners, so I should pass the test.

Her Last Day

Sleeping on my bed

I miss her most tonight. I thought, "It is time to go to bed with my computer and books"  and then "but first I have to take Nikki out first."  But of course Nikki is not here anymore.  I miss going out at night with her, seeing the moon, the stars, the trees sighing and the slight fear that someone may be in the shadows. But I had my guard dog with me.  Some people are afraid of little dogs or any dog. They bark. They might bite. Mine would probably lick someone to death first. But I felt mostly safe with her.

Yesterday I took my little girl Nikki dog to the vet. I knew she was very thin, last time we went she weighed 11 lbs. She should weigh 15 lbs at least. Now she weighed 9 lbs.  I knew she was not eating anything anymore but her treats. I knew she was not strong enough to get up sometimes when she squatted to pee.  I knew she had a stage 4 or 5 (out of 6) mitral valve prolapse (heart murmur) for years and takes a pill for it.  I knew she had a tumor in her abdomen that had grown very large, so large I could grab it with my fist and not begin to get my fist around it. I could feel the ridges of it even. It was taking up space in her tiny body, pushing her organs out of its way. I knew she was not having fun anymore. She hardly noticed when another dog was around. Normally she would bark her head off at another dog and try to chase the squirrels in the yard.

I had made an appointment last week to see the vet and make sure it was time. But I cancelled it because I couldn't face it. And I was sad, crying and depressed all that day.  So when I described to the vet assistant what was going on with Nikki and then the vet, Dr. Endicott at Woodhaven Veterinary Clinic, came in, I said, "It's time, isn't it?" and she nodded sadly.  She told me we could do it right then, that day. Or I could come back later that day or schedule another day. I was not prepared to do it right then. But I knew if I left it would be even harder to go back. And I knew my little companion of almost fifteen years was not having fun being a dog anymore. Her quality of life was very low.
She now weighed 9 lbs. She had lost 6 lbs over the last year. Her muscle mass was gone, she was skeletal, she was miserable.

The vet, Dr. Endicott, was the very best vet I could have ever asked for. She told me that I had given Nikki a glorious life, that she was not the dog she once was and showed me the picture of her they have of her healthy and full of life. Dr. Endicott explained exactly what would happen, as I cried. She said "Have you ever had to do this before?" and I shook my head and cried some more. I knew it had to be done. But I looked at my little girl and all I could think was, she has one bow in her hair. She needs to be washed off again (she was peeing on herself when sleeping) and she needed brushing.  The vet pointed out these things would probably be stressful to Nikki. Yes, they would be.

I had been told I did not need to be in the room but I knew how frightened she would be if I had left. So I stayed with her. She had been with me for almost 15 years, and I would be with her until the end. 

So the vet gave her the first shot, of sedation, after which I would have ten minutes to be with her. The first shot went right through her skin and came out the other side. She had no muscle and was so thin. So the vet got another shot and gave it to her. I sat by her and laid my head on the table with her as she lay on a very soft fleece pad. I petted her and looked at her and talked to her. She looked at me and occasionally blinked. Then the vet came in and gave her the next shot which would be much faster and I was looking at her and touching her when her life left her.

Dr. Endicott held me as I cried, devastated.  I was told I could stay with her as long as I wished but Nikki had left. So I kissed her and went to Devon's to be with the family I love. We all went to the Farmer's Market in Issaquah and I had a pulled pork slider and a strawberry ice cream cone. Thanks, Devon and Annie for being there for me when I really needed you.